Offseason Upgrades: Darren Collison and Roy Hibbert

The Hornets, Rockets, Nets, and Pacers just pulled off a four-team deal sending Trevor Ariza to New Orleans, Courtney Lee to Houston, Troy Murphy to New Jersey, and last but certainly not least Darren Collison to Indiana.  In other words, you best update your fantasy draft rankings!  (Mine are coming soon, by the way.)

Collison gets an instant upgrade, especially with the fact that the Pacers are reportedly trying to buy out T.J. Ford’s contract.  Of course, with promising second-year point guard A.J. Price still in the picture, along with free agent Earl Watson potentially sticking around, there are no guarantees in fantasy basketball.  (See: Ramon Sessions.) But I’m pretty excited about this move for Collison.

Don’t expect Lee and Murphy to see their fantasy values change too much (I could see Lee’s touches going down, as well as Murphy’s rebounds now that he’ll be playing alongside a more established center in Brook Lopez).  And while Ariza will likely benefit — especially from an efficiency perspective — from playing alongside Chris Paul, in my opinion the second biggest winner in this deal is Roy Hibbert.  In games that Murphy missed last year, Hibbert put up 3rd/4th round-type stats.  Does that mean you should draft him there?  I’ll let you know how he stacks up when I finish my draft rankings, but there’s a decent chance he could be this year’s Brook Lopez.

Lastly — from a non-fantasy basketball perspective — I understand this trade for every team…except New Orleans.  Houston unloaded some salary without (in my opinion) losing too much talent.  (Yes, I like Courtney Lee.  And Ariza is at best a third or fourth option on a championship team.)  Indiana finally snatched the point guard it was looking for, while giving Hibbert (not to mention Tyler Hansbrough) a chance to really shine.  New Jersey took another step towards getting more competitive.  (By the way, I haven’t mentioned Anthony Morrow yet this summer, but in case you missed it he’s now a Net.)

But New Orleans?  They trade away their Chris Paul Insurance Policy for an overpaid role player.  I believe the Hornets brass had good intentions (“See, Chris?  We’re willing to spend money to build a contender!”), but this move could ultimately haunt them for years to come, especially when CP3 teams up with D12…  Or Melo and Amare…

, , , , , , , , , , , ,

2 Comments

Tyreke Evans stars in “Real Stories of the Highway Patrol”

LeBron James may have had his own primetime special and Ron Artest may have his own reality show, but Tyreke Evans is a good bet to be the first NBA star featured on “Real Stories of the Highway Patrol.”  Evans was caught on (helicopter) camera racing on the highway at speeds of up to 130 mph last Memorial Day.  As the SacBee rightly puts it, it’s probably too early to give Evans the keys to the team.  Fortunately, for those of us who live in a fantasy world, 20-5-5 is 20-5-5 no matter how dumb you is in real life.

God I love fantasy basketball.  Where else can your second round draft pick get arrested at gun point…and yet the thing you hate most about him is his lack of 3-point range?

, ,

2 Comments

In case you were thinking of wearing a LeBron Heat jersey in Cleveland…

Last night, some idiot wore a LeBron James Heat jersey to a Cleveland Indians game…in Cleveland.  Can you say “cautionary tale”?  He probably wasn’t being that rowdy himself, but with the ruckus he was stirring up, security was forced to escort him out of the game — probably to keep him safe a la Bartman ’03.

It’s no wonder LeBron spent last weekend in Vegas instead of back home.  And with the reaction LeSchmuck #6 got at Progressive Field, if LeBron ever sets foot in Cleveland again, he might need more than the five bodyguards that were hovering around him at all times on the Vegas strip.

A few angles of LeSchmuck #6 from the Indians game:

Frankly, I’m impressed he survived all the way until the sixth inning before security escorted him out.  That’s like a Cavs fan sitting through back-to-back airings of The Decision without punching a hole in the guy wearing a LeBron Heat jersey sitting next to him.

I wonder if a guy wearing a Chris Bosh Heat jersey to a Blue Jays game would get the same treatment.  Probably not because a) Canadians are much nicer people.  b) Who goes to Blue Jays games?  And c) Canadians can’t read.

Hey, at least they stopped chanting “asshole.”

,

3 Comments

2010 Fantasy Basketball Alert: Jeremy Lin will be owned in 50+% of leagues this year

Not only can Jeremy Lin dunk a basketball, he can also calculate its circumference, bitch. (Chris Wraight, GoCrimson.com)

I haven’t mentioned Jeremy Lin, the point/combo guard out of Harvard, on this site for lack of my man-crush on him.  It’s just that he hadn’t done anything newsworthy in the fantasy basketball universe for those outside of Fantasy Ivy Leagues to warrant it.  (Note: Fantasy Ivy Leagues are about as rare as Fantasy WNBA Leagues.)

But when Lin started tearing up the summer league — and by “tearing up” of course I mean outhustling John Wall for a nice stretch in a game last week… but hey, that’s all NBA scouts are really looking for from the end of their bench anyway, right? — I started dreaming up the possibilities:

I, an Asian dude, could finally own another Asian dude in my fantasy league.

(And, no, that wasn’t meant to sound that gay.)

No offense, Yao Ming or Yi Jianlian.  I’ve owned both of you in leagues past.  In fact, after Yao got hurt at the end of the 05-06 season, I even sneakily drafted him in the early second round the next year.  (Well, at least it was sneaky until he got hurt again.)  But the fact is, I’ve got about as much in common with Yao Ming as I do with Shaquille O’Neal.  They’re both very large men with very different playing styles than mine (scrappy hustler) whom I can barely understand in interviews.  Would Yao or Yi ever take a charge in a rec league like I would?  Doubtful.  Would Jeremy Lin?  Maybe to probably.

Unfortunately, I've got more in common with the guy on the left.

But while Lin’s strong play in the summer league was enough to get me excited about basketball in general, it wasn’t until today when I started getting excited about his prospects for fantasy basketball.  But let me take a quick step back first, for the few of you who haven’t been paying attention.

Although Lin led Harvard to its best season in decades and turned in several strong performances against NBA-caliber opponents in college, he went undrafted.  But Donnie Nelson, Dallas’ savvy GM, decided to invite him to play for the Mavericks in the summer league.  At the time (a few weeks ago), Nelson told Lin he was probably about a year from the NBA and wanted Lin to play for the Mavericks’ D-League affiliate in the meantime.

Now, I think Donnie Nelson is a genius for two reasons: 1) he recognized Lin’s high basketball IQ, something that could easily get lost in the shuffle of the rigorous athletic tests during pre-draft workouts.  And 2) he recognized Lin’s marketing potential.  Even if this kid doesn’t save the world, as it seems a lot of fans are prematurely hoping he does, he’s going to fill seats.  And not just with skinny little Asian butts, but with the butts of anyone who’s ever rooted for an underdog before, because even though some Harvard kid wouldn’t be considered an underdog in almost any other walk of life, he sure is in the NBA.  Plus, Dallas’ D-League affiliate just moved from Colorado to Fort Worth (just outside of Dallas), so some extra hype couldn’t hurt in filling seats, right?  And just to throw it in there — Nelson is also the principal owner and operator of the club.

But I digress.  Whatever your motives, Donnie Nelson, thanks for giving the kid a chance.  And since then, the Mavericks, Lakers and an undisclosed Eastern Conference team have all expressed interest in signing Lin to a contract.  But with any of those teams (unless that Eastern Conference team was the Knicks), I still wouldn’t be excited about Lin’s fantasy prospects… until I read this:

Lin near deal with Warriors

I don’t know if this is the best fit for him as a player, but the Warriors are the best fit for anyone in fantasy.  (And actually, it might not be that bad of a fit for him as a player either, especially with C.J. Watson going to Chicago.  Also, Lin’s slashing, run-and-gun style could be a nice fit in GS.)

But here’s the main reason why I’m confident Lin will be owned in 50+% of fantasy leagues this year — and I’ll do it in list form.

Chris Hunter
Cartier Martin
Anthony Tolliver
Reggie Williams
Anthony Morrow
C.J. Watson
Anthony Randolph

I could really go on and on, but these are just a few of the names that 1) nobody knew about two years ago and 2) you, me, or someone in your (competitive) fantasy basketball league owned at some point last year.  It might have been only for a spot-start, but still, all these guys were fantasy-legit thanks to Golden State.

Add in the fact that your Asian buddy, or your white girl-space-friend who has an Asian fetish (because there are tons of those, right?) will want to own an Asian-American dude on his, or her, team, and voila — you magically hit that 50+% ownership mark in Yahoo leagues.  Now of course, I’m not saying Lin should be drafted.  Not even in the deepest of fantasy leagues.  I’m just saying he will be owned, and in plenty of leagues.  The biggest threat to my theory is if the new ownership in The City decides to slow down the Warriors’ traditional up-tempo style, but when one of the owners is an entertainment mogul, I don’t see that happening.  At least not soon.

So, welcome to the League, JLin.  Look forward to picking you up on waivers for a spot start sometime in mid-February, if not sooner.

, , , , , , , , , ,

9 Comments

LeBron Videos Is Fun

No Comments

It’s Official: Steve Carell “LeBrons” Chili’s

In case you missed the ESPYs (like I did), Steve Carell and Paul Rudd did a pretty funny spoof of The Decision.  (And by the way, yes, I’m trying to coin the term “LeBron” as a verb — as in, “I just got LeBronned” — so that people have an alternate way to convey a backstabbing, regular stabbing, or any general screwing over of.)

Just a week ago, nobody made fun of LeBron.  Funny how one ill-advised Decision (the medium not the message) changed all that…

No Comments

It’s Official: LeBron James Stabs Cleveland in the Asshole

I was really meaning to take the summer off from fantasy basketball, but the news of LeBron James joining Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh in Miami was just too damn irresistible.  I’m gonna keep this short and sweet though and let this guy’s  =( do the writing for me:

What does LeBron’s ass-stabbing mean for fantasy drafts?  Or rather, who will go #1 in drafts this fall?  Fortunately, we have a couple months to let the rest of the smaller and less important dominoes fall into place… but if Miami can’t flip Michael Beasley for a decent center (or in fantasy terms, someone who could steal away a couple rebounds per game from LeBron), the King could actually average a triple-double next year.  Think about it: instead of having to make perfect passes to Anderson Varejao or praying that Anthony Parker hits an open three, all LeBron has to do is hit Bosh in the chest for a mid-range jumper or lob the ball in the general vicinity of the rim for a Wade throwdown/easy assist.  And while his scoring might slide, LeBron will still easily average 20+ ppg, probably closer to 25.

For the time being, my gut still tells me Kevin Durant should go #1 in fantasy drafts because of his amazing efficiency and ability to hit the three consistently, but as LeBron’s supporting cast (or is it Wade’s supporting cast?) becomes clearer these next few weeks, we’ll have a better idea who should top draft boards.

On a related note: LeBron James also kicks New York in the Asshole.

, , , , ,

No Comments

Done and Doner: The 2009-10 Fantasy Basketball Awards Post

Yes, I know I used this picture already. But come on. Like Durant's game, it's just too pretty not to appreciate. (Getty)

Fantasy MVP: LeBron vs. Durantula

Another way to look at this comparison is LeBron’s 8.6 apg vs Durant’s .899 FT%, because all the other stats are basically a wash.  But I’m not going to waste your time.  And yes, I know it’s been said enough already, so much so that it’s not really much of a shocking statement anymore, but I’ll say it again.

Kevin Durant was the Fantasy MVP of the 2009-10 season.

Not only were his per game averages the highest, his totals were also the highest as he didn’t miss a game all year.  (LeBron missed 6 games.  And most of them came at the season’s end… during H2H playoff weeks.)

Before the fantasy trade deadline back in February, I suggested Durant might lead more fantasy teams to victory than LeBron.  Actually… (WARNING: douche alert) I told people to trade LeBron for Durant.  Even if The King had played out the rest of the season, I still think this would’ve been the right thing to do.  But since LeBron was sidelined, I’d be shocked if Durantula didn’t lead more squads to fantasy gold.

You know who has my vote.  What about yours?

Fantasy MVP

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Draft Pick of the Year

The finalists: Stephen Curry, Joakim Noah, David Lee, and Andrew Bogut.

Of course, this depends on if you actually drafted — and hung onto — Curry.  Before the season, he was my second highest-ranked rookie behind Blake Griffin (that turned out well), and I’d just like to take a moment to thank Monta Ellis for personally making me downgrade Curry from a 10th round pick to a 12th round pick, causing me to miss out on him.  (“Us together? No.”)  Ef you, Monta.

But I digress.  According to BasketballMonster, Curry was a top 5 player over the last 3 months of the year.  Insane.  And he did it all as a rookie.  Holy fock.  Where people draft Curry next year will be very interesting.  Could he actually be a late first round pick??

As for the other guys… if you owned them, you know how valuable they were.  Lee was drafted in early-middle rounds and provided top 10 value.  Bogut and Noah each missed some time due to injury, but delivered great value from the late rounds.  But really, they’re just here to make Curry look that much better in the poll below.

Draft Pick of the Year

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Note: Honorable mention goes to my boy Aaron Brooks because, frankly, he just needs to be mentioned somewhere in this article.

Bust of the Year

The finalists: Al Jefferson, Jose Calderon, Gilbert Arenas, and Shawn Marion.

I know my answer.  I drafted Jefferson in the second round of my most competitive league (oopsie!), later trading him for Nene (a fifth round pick).

Even though Calderon is slightly overrated (and literally I might add, at least according to ESPN and Yahoo, which don’t account for his low FT attempts), I projected him as a third round pick based on consistency, efficiency, and 8+ apg.  Well, none of those happened.

As for Arenas, well, the fact that he’s currently serving a (shortened) sentence in jail should sum that story up.

And as for Marion, it turns out we got Matrix (gasp) Revolutions-type numbers.

Bust of the Year

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

FA Pickup of the Year (1st half)

The finalists: Danilo Gallinari, Channing Frye, Marc Gasol, and Anthony Morrow.

It’s amazing how these same guys were donkeys for the latter part of the year, which is why I broke up my FA Pickup of the Year award into two halves.  But since the first half of the 09-10 season feels like about 47 years ago, I’ll let you guys decide who deserveth this award.

FA Pickup of the Year (1st half)

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

FA Pickup of the Year (2nd half)

The finalists: Andray Blatche, Darren Collison, Anthony Tolliver, and Carlos Delfino.

Alright, this feels more like the current 09-10 season, even though none of these guys were on people’s radars before February.  (Well, unless you listened to some people who talked about stashing Andray Blatche away weeks before the trading deadline.  Just saying.)  I was fortunate enough to own all of these guys on the same team in one league.  (I guess that makes up for somehow not owning any of the 1st half candidates in any leagues.)  I suspect that those of you in H2H leagues might favor Blatche considering WAS great playoff schedule, while those of you in roto leagues might favor Collison (whose worst weeks came during what would’ve been crucial playoff weeks in H2H leagues).  I dunno, you tell me.

FA Pickup of the Year (2nd half)

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Fantasy Rookie of the Year

The finalists: Stephen Curry, Tyreke Evans, Brandon Jennings (this is more for nostalgia), and Darren Collison (honorable mention).

Like the MVP award, the fantasy winner is different than the (expected) reality winner.  Stephen Curry was hands-down the most valuable rookie in fantasy ball this year.  (Yes, I still hate you, Monta.)  But, hey, remember when this debate was just Evans vs. Jennings?  Ah, we were so young back then.

Fantasy Rookie of the Year

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Fantasy Eye-Opening Line of the Year

If there’s one thing I love, it’s a nice line in a box score.  Almost makes me miss the feeling of having a newspaper in my hand, even if they didn’t have +/- stats back then.  (Do newspapers still exist?)  Anyhow, there were so many amazing individual performances this year, it’s hard to pick just a few.  I made it easy on myself by narrowing down the finalists to the best triple-doubles of the year.  Feel free to write in your own nominees below.

LeBron: LeBron went off against Melo in an OT game back in February.  (Yes, it was the Cavs’ first game after the All-Star break which was also a nationally televised TNT game.  What can I say, he’s a showman!)  He tallied 43, 13, and 15 with a trey, 2 stl and 4 blk.  But Melo had the last laugh as the Nuggets got the W.

Stephen Curry: Meanwhile, everyone’s favorite rookie (again, ef you, Monta) went off against a pathetic Clipper squad right before the All-Star break, tallying 36, 10, and 13 with 3 stl and a whopping 7 treys.  And the best play of the game might not even have belonged to Curry.  (See: Anthony Tolliver’s buzzer-beating box out.)

David Lee: Our last nominee shouldn’t really count because it came against Golden State, but the numbers are just too eye-opening to ignore.  Lee went off for 37, 20, and 10 against the Warriors earlier this month.  Those are officially video game stats, y’all.

Fantasy Eye-Opening Line of the Year

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

And last but not least…

Most Embarrassing Moment of the Year

Sure, there was Nate Robinson’s shot on his own basket and whatever that thing was on Ron Artest’s head.  Oh yeah, and let’s not forget about Gilbert “Guns don’t kill fantasy basketball seasons; I do” Arenas!  But the truly embarrassing moments of the year all happened in cyberspace.  Click at your own risk, perverts.  (Don’t worry, all legit links though.)

Greg Oden’s “oddly, I feel better about myself” penis picture.

Dorell Wright’s oh-so-wrong dong photos.

George Hill’s slut pics.

FantasyHoopster’s magical shlong.

Most Embarrassing Moment of the Year

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Gosh, I hope I don’t get penis spam on this site because of this.  That would sooo not be worth it.  Anyway, thanks for reading, everyone.  Hope I helped some of you finish in the money, realize your dreams, or learn how to read.  Til next season.

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

4 Comments

Injury Timeout: Chris Paul

From Adrian Wojnarowski’s Twitter account:

Chris Paul will miss the rest of the season with a ligament tear in a finger, the Hornets say. He won’t need surgery.”

Darren Collison, get ready to shake up some leagues again!  I knew there was a reason I was hanging onto you in my roto league, but as of right now he’s currently available in 35% of Yahoo leagues.  Make sure yours isn’t one of them.

, ,

3 Comments

Eye-opening lines: Earl Barron and JaVale McGee

Attention, Andrew Bogut owners.  I’m sorry.  His (gruesome) injury comes at the worst possible time of the year for those in H2H leagues.  (Unless your league just ended… then, phew!)  Of course, a little dislocated elbow isn’t going to keep you from winning your league (well, unless you’re a member of the Milwaukee Bucks).  But never fear; help is on the way…

A couple young’ns posted some monster lines on Tuesday.  One of them has been mentioned on this site several times, but seems to be getting more consistent minutes lately.  The other is being mentioned for the first time this entire season, but might actually be the better option.  (Well, depending on what you need.)  Of course, they’re not going to replace Bogut’s production, but they can get you some of that 16/10/2.5 back.

JaVale McGee

McGee posted a monster 25 and 15 (with 3 blk) line…against the Warriors.  Yeah, so divide that by two — I think that’s the proper accounting principle when adjusting for games played against GSW (sorry, I’m doing my taxes now) — and you actually get roughly what McGee has averaged the last 4 games: 12.8 ppg and 6.8 rpg with 1.5 bpg.  Damn, that’s some good accounting if I do say so myself.

(Buyer beware: The Wizards’ next game is against Orlando, so unless you want to risk McGee playing something like 12 minutes vs. Dwight Howard, you might want to wait until the next game to start him.)

Earl Barron

Meanwhile, in just his second game of the year for the Knicks, Barron posted a 17 and 18 line in 44 minutes against the Celtics.  In his first game (Sunday), he tallied 10 and 6 in just 18 minutes.  He actually started at C against the Celtics, which very well could have been for matchup purposes, but he seems to have caught the attention of Mike D’Antoni.  If you’re desperate for rebounds, he could be a nice pickup, especially in deeper leagues.

(Buyer beware: Ditto on above.  I probably wouldn’t touch Barron for the Knicks’ game vs. the Magic later this week.)

Honorable mention: Kurt Thomas

Thomas grabbed a very respectable 14 rebounds vs. the Bulls in Bogut’s absence.  He’s probably a safer option than Barron, but then again, his name doesn’t sound like a tasty frozen pizza.

, , , ,

2 Comments